That's so gay

What does it mean when someone says "That's so gay"? We hear this phrase all the time. In use it is akin to "That's so lame" or "That's so dumb". Often, the people who use the phrase don't intend to insult gay people and just think it's a catchy, kind of funny phrase. But the phrase "That's so gay" equates the word gay with being lame or being dumb. The phrase means that being gay is uncool, even if that's not the intended message.

A few weeks ago I was in a woman's washroom when I overheard another young woman say "That's so Jew!" I stopped dead in my tracks and asked her if she just said that. I thought what she said was impossibly disturbing. She admitted to having heard the phrase a few minutes earlier and thought she'd try it out herself. It seems she realized that it was a stupid thing to say and said she wouldn't say it again.

Now, in all honesty, I'm not the most politically correct person I know. Just today I walked up to a pride table (with fruit on it) on campus, signed up for the mailing list, and asked if the fruit on the table was 'gay people food'. Then I joked that I was eating my gay apple like a total homosexual. Because the fruit was on the gay pride table! I thought it was funny.

So, I'm not entirely PC all the time. But in public spaces, I think it's important to be aware of the meaning behind our words. The apple was delicious, by the way. Deliciously homosexual. So maybe "That's so gay" is okay with me if it means it's absolutely fantastic, like so fantastically gay.

What do you think?

The Epic Lego Solution

This post is my comedic bitch/rant about Lego, and contains mild swear words.

So my son loves Lego. He has played with Lego every single day of his life since the day he was old enough to play with it without choking himself to death by shoving it down his windpipe. And in his case that was probably before he was two years old. So the boy has a LOT of Lego. And he plays with it constantly. He enjoys it. He stays occupied. And while he insists on making me sit through a new rendition of “look at this new thing I made and what it does and what every little tiny miniscule detailed part is intended to do, and watch me fly it into your face several times” spiel every five and a half minutes (everything you’ve ever made looks exactly the same to me, sorry kid!) for the most part, his Lego thing works for me.

My big beef with Lego is that shit gets EVERYWHERE. And we live in a one bedroom apartment, which doesn’t leave a lot of room for his crap to be everywhere. (We live in a one bedroom apartment because as a single mom, I have no other bitches to pay for all this Lego, and I don’t know what I would do with this child if he didn’t have Lego).

I usually have two options. Suffer through the joy of walking all over makes-me-want-to-kill-someone Lego in my living room, or harass the boy to clean it up, every five-and-a-half-minutes. His response is always “But I’m still playing with it!” He’s always still playing with it. He never ever stops playing with it.

I’ve come up with a solution that I would patent if I had any hope of figuring that shit out and actually following through. I’ve created a Lego bag thing. Okay, fine, it’s only a sheet cut into a square with a hair elastic tied around the corner, but it’s genius, just listen: The boy can play with his Lego ON THE SHEET (Lego off the sheet is vacuum food) and when I get sick of the Lego being everywhere, I can lift up the corners, wrap the hair elastic around the top, and it is GONE. All the things he was working on are inside, and I am happy. He is happy. And I don’t have to feel like my living room is a minefield of Lego waiting to explode under my tender feets.

If you decide to patent this Lego bag yourself and make millions, remember me in my one bedroom apartment and cut me a slice, friend. :-)

Stumble like:


Facebook like:

Twitter us:
data-count="horizontal" data-via="SLMother">Tweet

Facebook Comments:

Dear person uncomfortable with the gay people

Dear person uncomfortable with the gay people.

Hello. Nice to meet you. My name is __________. I see that you feel a little uncomfortable with the gay people.

I've heard some people say that they're okay with lesbians, but not okay with gay men, because what those men do in bed makes you feel uncomfortable. I have a pretty easy solution. Picture your parents having sex. Picture them naked, and kissing, and touching. Picture one of your parents on top of the other. Know that they actually had to have done this at least once, and probably did it a lot more than that. They may even be doing it right now. I know that this feels like it should be illegal. I know it is not the prettiest thing for you to imagine. And it sure seems ungodly when you think about it. But here is the thing. People have sex. Some people have sex and it doesn't do anything for you when you think about it. But that doesn't mean your parent's intimacy should be outlawed. I don't think it's a big stretch to say the same thing for the gay guys. Stop picturing your parents or the gay people naked if it freaks you out. It's still okay.

I've heard some people say that God hates gay people. I think that God is going to be seriously pissed off at the people who say that. Jesus didn't say a thing about gay people. He walked the earth loving everyone. And the bible says "love thy neighbor". It says "Do unto others as you would have done unto you". It does not say "judge thy neighbor" or "disallow others the rights you enjoy yourself". Homosexuality is not actually listed as a sin. And even so, Jesus loved the sinners too. So before you use religion to back up your reasoning, take a closer look at the bible, because God is going to be pissed at you.

I've heard some people say that the word marriage should only be used when it involves only a man and a woman. As I understand it, this is supposed to protect the sanctity of marriage the institution as we have known it for hundreds of years. In fact, the sanctity of marriage was preserved from mixed-raced couples marrying, all the way up to 1967 in some states in the US. The sanctity of marriage has been preserved through Brittany Spears' 24 hour marriage and through the divorce rate rising to epic proportions. The idea of a sanctity of marriage is the unicorn of our time. It's a beautiful idea, but it isn't real. Basing your judgments about the gay people according to how it will influence the unicorns is not a good decision.

I have heard some people say that they just don't understand why the gay people can't just be straight people, because that would be a lot more comfortable for the straight people. The gay people would want to know the same thing about you, but they already know that you couldn't be a gay person any easier than they could be a straight person. If you think the gay people should just become straight people, than I want you to think of how difficult or easy it would be for you to become a gay person, and what you would need to do to make that work out for you.

If you have any more questions or concerns about the gay people, ask. We can all be happy on this planet together, if you open your heart you will see that everyone is very similar on the inside. Everyone just wants to love the people important to them, and be treated fairly.

Sincerely,
KR Munro

ps. Don't forget to share this post with those who need to hear it.